Neighbours

He was too gutless to admit the real reason he wanted me out so he stood behind his big principal mask and said there was a new 'zero tolerance towards violence' policy implemented which was the reason I was kicked out.  He was just waiting for me to slip up I reckon. So when Justin kept on teasing me, I retaliated. And Simpson got his reason to kick me out. Not that I am condoning my actions, I should’ve been the bigger person and ignored Justin. He’s such an idiot that guy! Even Dad thought he deserved what he got. I did get him good didn’t I!

But it won’t stop him, he’ll continue to be a bully and Andrew Simpson will continue to be a “tool”! I guess there is a right and a wrong way to stick up for yourself, and I just did it the wrong way.

Hey how strange was my dream. That dream I had was a warning for me, somehow my subconscious knew I was going to be bullied at school. I should’ve prepared myself for it instead of lowering myself to Justin’s standards! Declan was so fired up that he did the first thing that came to mind for him, to attack when being attacked. The whole picture on the blackboard thing, it was so juvenile. I was so annoyed at Declan for acting out in that way….and then I did it! Such a hypocrite.  Bad timing too, I pushed him right in front of Simpson, playing  into Justin’s hands. It hasn’t been fun seeing his smug face about town since I was expelled. It makes me want to wipe it right off his face…. Yeah yeah, I know, that’s what got me in trouble in the first place!

Then the whole thing with Mum trying to take control of my life, and then Paul… jeez, I should’ve seen him coming. I’ve been soooo naïve! Maybe that’s why adults want to take over everything, I think I've kinda proved that when I take control of my future I just mess it up!

Then Toadie got me all worked up about the Teen Mum thing, “fighting prejudice to get the best education for my future and the babies”. You know me, never want to back down without a fight! Mum warned me about going public and I didn’t listen. Even Rachel tried to talk me out of it, she knew I shouldn’t trust Paul Robinson. But I didn’t listen. Headstrong Didge always knows best!! Yeah right…. The repercussions of that article are still being felt in Ramsay Street.  Dec’s AFL career has been put at risk… then Dad attacked Paul, giving Simpson more ammunition to rest his case! Susan's put her job on the line and Dan and Libby got suspended because of the article Susan wrote in response to mine about Policy and Prejudice at Erinsborough High. I mean it’s awesome everyone is so behind me, but I could’ve dealt with it better than I have I think. As Dad said, it was the front page article I instigated that started all this mess.

It was pretty funny though that Mum tipped garbage all over Simpson’s head! He did deserve that.

But I didn’t want everyone to get in to trouble because of me. It’s good to fight, but sometimes you’ve got to know when to lay down your guns and maybe that’s my lesson here. I need to know when to give up.

Besides…I’m one of the lucky ones. Some people aren’t as lucky to have all these wonderful people around them like I do in Ramsay Street. Some people get bullied every day, and they don’t have anyone to stick up for them. I have so much to be thankful for. Maybe my education can wait until all of this has blown over. Maybe I need to look after the baby and I first and then think about my education. I should just let Declan get on with his career so he can take care of us.

As Harold said… young people are life’s greatest joy, I will love being a mum.

Didge x

PS. Don’t stand for bullying. Nobody should have to put up with bad behaviour from someone else, there is help and support out there. I had a look on the net and found out there is a group called ‘Enough is Enough’, set up to help victims of violence and anti-social behaviour. I should’ve looked in to it before I went back to school, I didn't have the benefit of hindsight then but I did have the warnings from my dream! Anyway, all you have to do is go to the website www.enoughisenough.org.au for more information, or contact the 24 hour Victim Support Line on 1800 633 063 for immediate one on one care. There are qualified counsellors available to talk about bullying and harassment and how to deal with it. Stand up for yourself before it’s too late, like it was with me.